My Bad...

We've all faced it, those 'uh-oh', 'oops', 'why' moments, that sinking feeling in your stomach when you realize that you've messed up, that ache in your chest when you roll over the next morning wishing you could erase the night before, the shame, dread, doubt, regret.

Everybody makes mistakes. We've all made decisions that we wish we could take back. We all have regrets.

I shouldn't have bought that shirt. I should've studied harder for that test. I shouldn't have been driving so fast. I shouldn't have gone to that party. I shouldn't have talked to that boy. I shouldn't have dated that boy. I shouldn't have broken up with that boy.

The list could go on forever- things we all think we shouldn't have done or even things we all think we should have, things we wish we had done or things we wish we hadn't.

But the truth is that there is no such thing as a mistake. Each decision, no matter how big or small, shapes the course of our life, makes us who we are. What we eat, where we go, who we meet, who we leave, all of these things alter our lives in some way.

It is so true that when one door closes another door opens and typically we've sunken so deep in the regret that we don't realize it. Maybe another opportunity doesn't immediately appear from our 'mistakes,' but we've learned something all the same. Because of something we did or didn't do, we learn not to do it again, or to behave differently next time.

So maybe the very things that we regret are actually blessings in disguise. Next time you feel that horrible anxiety and regret, take a look at all the good that has come from the very thing you wish you hadn't done.


Maybe you won't go to that same bar again, maybe you met a best friend or a new love, maybe you're thankful that his next sleezy girl is just as low-down as he is, maybe you know what to do to bring those grades back up, maybe you've gotten a little stronger, maybe you know just who it is that you want to be, maybe you know just whose help you really need. As long as God is leading you, no decision is truly a mistake. He will never lead you to a mountain too high to climb.


So go ahead follow your heart. Take lots of chances, take lots of risks, and never leave a door unopened or a stone unturned.

Two Years Later...

"You know the great thing, though, is that change can be so constant you don't even feel the difference until there is one. It can be so slow that you don't even notice that your life is better or worse, until it is. Or it can just blow you away; make you something different in an instant."


- Life as a House

One of the greatest things about coming home from college is the comfort and familiarity of home sweet home. It is the memories that flood every single road, store, restaurant, random field, or broken old swing by the lake. But along with the familiarity comes the realization that none of us are who we used to be. 

From the day we are all born we begin to change. We don't realize it because these changes are just part of growing up. But once we go off to college and come back to reunite with all of our old friends, we begin to notice these small differences. We look back upon relationships that have ended. The high school sweethearts that we were so sure were soulmates no longer speak to each other. The most talented athletes haven't touched a ball since we graduated. The smartest kids are failing class and barely getting by. The innocent ones are into some of the worst things. Everyone is different.

Some change for the better and some change for the worse, but everyone has changed. It's not that things have changed. It's that people have changed, in turn making things different. The hardest part is not looking upon these changes and becoming sad. I've had to learn to look at these changes as part of the inevitable, appreciate the memories, and to just let go. There's no going back, so we have to keep moving forward, accepting the very changes that we never saw coming.

"We have to keep reinventing ourselves almost every minute because the world can change in an instant, and there's no time for looking back. Sometimes the changes are forced on us, sometimes they happen by accident, and we make the most of them. We have to constantly come up with new ways to fix ourselves. So we change, we adapt, we create new versions of ourselves. We just need to be sure that this one is an improvement over the last."

—Grey’s Anatomy

"Nothing stays the same. You grow up, make friends, lose friends, go to college, lose track of people, meet new ones, and sometimes you ask yourself why. But all I can tell you is that every single experience you go through like this changed you in some way. Every new person who comes into your life changes you. Every moral dilemma or emotional experience you come up against changes you. It's your job to decide how. That's how character is developed."

She don't hold on to nothin' new for very long...

"There is always one person you love who becomes that definition. It usually happens retrospectively, but it happens eventually. This is the person who unknowingly sets the template for what you will always love about other people, even if some of these lovable qualities are self-destructive and unreasonable. The person who defines your understanding of love is not inherently different than anyone else; they’re often just the person you happen to meet the first time you really, really, want to love someone. But that person still wins. They win, and you lose. Because for the rest of your life, they will control how you feel about everyone else." -Chuck Klosterman, Killing Yourself To Live

And the winner is.....

"Blending a linebacker's body with a tailback's speed and quickness, the 6-foot-6, 250-pounder from Georgia has guided Auburn to a perfect season. His numbers are off the charts: an SEC-best 1,409 yards rushing with 21 touchdowns, and 2,589 yards passing and 28 TD passes. He's the first SEC player to run for at least 1,000 yards and pass for at least 2,000 in the same season.

Early in the season, Auburn shredded defenses with Newton on the ground. Working out of offensive coordinator Gus Malzahn's spread attack, he ran for at least 176 yards in four straight SEC games. Not even Bo Jackson, the last Auburn player to win the Heisman, did that.

As the season wore on and opponents focused on stopping Newton from running wild, he started beating them with his arm. Newton threw 15 touchdown passes and only one interception in the final five games, saving maybe his best performance for last. In a 56-17 victory over South Carolina in the SEC title game, Newton passed for 335 yards and four touchdowns and ran for 73 yards and two scores.

By mid-October, Newton was the clear Heisman front-runner and, ultimately, not even the scandal could slow his Heisman run."

As if his stats and raw talent aren't enough, Cam's shining personality and sheer, unwavering determination speak volumes. If there was an obstacle that could possibly be put in his path, it was, and Cam overcame curveball after curveball that was thrown his way. He is the epitome of a legendary player, as well as an amazing person, and is undeniably the most deserving of the Heisman candidates. I'm so thankful to be a part of the Auburn athletic department and the Auburn family, and I could not be more proud of our THIRD Heisman trophy winner. War Damn Eagle, War Damn Cam, and War Damn Landslide Victory!

"Newton will become the ninth Heisman winner in the last 11 years to play in the BCS National Championship Game. The previous eight have been 2-6. For a guy who overcame legal and academic problems at Florida, who arrived at Auburn with one season of starting experience at a junior college, who went from all of that to win the best-known individual honor in American sports, those odds don't seem long at all."

Freedom

For the past month or so, my life has been completely consumed with football and schoolwork. Although the football isn't over yet...we still have a national championship to play in...fall semester finally is. I managed to get out alive with 2 A's and 2 B's...my first B ever. Shockingly, there were no tears or drama...just excitement. I couldn't be happier that I managed to get out of genetics and chem 2 with B's. On a sad note, I had to give up my ticket to Glendale today. I just can't miss the school that Auburn refuses to cancel. My teachers don't seem to want to help me out either. But A202 is already planning a big shindig for the big game, and I'll be cheering louder than ever. Here's what I've been up to lately...

Halloween

Julia's Birthday

Tigerettes

28-27...Iron Bowl :)

Tacky Christmas Social

SEC CHAMPIONS!!!